Don't Forget to Show Up for Yourself

There was a time in my life that I measured my worth based upon how I perceived I was making other people feel. I would aim to please others. I would observe and try to adapt my moves based on what it seemed like they enjoyed. It was like playing the living role of a chameleon. With all of our moves growing up due to my father’s military assignments, I had to figure out a way to socially to feel “a part of something”.

Despite my best efforts, I never truly did feel a part of anything really. In high school I participated in track and field, marching band and some other random clubs at each school, but always only feeling like a temporary substitute as my experience began to be that all things would be short lived. Taking on this type of thinking and stance only hindered my ability to truly understand and know how to nurture future relationships when they really counted.

By college, I had adapted the position that I only needed one person. One person is sustainable for me to be able to cope with navigating my environment. Before my college experience could even begin, during summer orientation, that one person became my boyfriend. And for the rest of my time at college it again felt like a temporary substitute despite my joining one of the BEST bands in the land (NSU Spartan Legion) and joining the BEST sorority of the divine nine Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Incorporated. I still felt not a part of something truly.

It was only through the various trials and tribulations in life that I began to learn the importance of showing up for yourself. How could I really feel a part of something back then if I was not connected and did not feel a part of myself?

When you do start showing up for yourself amazing things start to happen inside of you and around you. There is an organic energy that radiates from you. You shine a little brighter. You are in alignment with your needs. You know the difference between your needs and wants. You begin to understand the power of your worth and existence.

So looking back, I tell my younger self: “I am super proud of you. You navigated a tough situation, the best way you could with the tools you had available to you at the time”. Now as I enter into the decade of my 40s I am excited. I feel as I am becoming more into myself. Apart of myself. I still have more inner work to do. But who doesn’t? Growing should be happening on a regular basis. Because if it is not, you are no longer alive on the inside and it will show on the outside.

So today, chose to stop wasting time and step into your power. Don’t forget to show up for yourself. Don’t be afraid of the amazing things you can accomplish if you just believe.

With Light & Love, JP